(bippity boppity boo hoo)
I have a confession to make and don’t hate me for it. There is no easy way to say this so I’m just going to say it… I have lived in Florida for almost 13 years and I’ve NEVER BEEN TO DISNEY WORLD! I know, I KNOW, that’s so tragic, right? How can this be?
There are more than a few reasons for this. The first is my workaholic tendencies and the fact that I never take vacations. The second is that I’m perpetually broke. The third is that I’m terrible with crowds. Terrible. The fourth and biggest reason is that going to amusement parks is a HUGE sore spot for me having to do with my first (and probably only) marriage.
I don’t talk about my marriage / divorce in this space very often. This is my happy space, and honestly I can’t really remember much of what happened in that relationship anymore so it only comes up once in a while. Long story short (ha ha, too late!) I always wanted him to take me, but he never did. And, the year that I specifically asked to go to Orlando for my birthday, he said NO. Then, a couple days before my birthday, he and his co-workers went…instead. It’s like he took my birthday away and gave it to someone else. What a douche, right? That was the beginning of the end.
I’m painfully aware that I should be over this by now. But here I am, talking about it and still haven’t been to Disney World (almost 7 years later). Why don’t I go? Why is this even a secret?
Well, I guess it’s because whenever I’ve told anyone… they first are aghast, then solemnly SWEAR to take me… but it never happens. I pretty much refuse to go alone, as if my various affective disorders would ever allow it. My girlfriends took me to Universal a few short days after my divorce was final. They tried really hard (LOVE YOU GUYS!), but it was like leaving a funeral and saying… I’m going to Disney World! Not fun. I’ve been threatened a few times with a trip to Sea World… but I cannot imagine how anyone would ever get me there. I’m deathly afraid of water, and giant animals, and we already know I’m terrible with crowds, you do the math.
So, the secret is OUT and I don’t really know what to do next. I’m still making plans for my birthday this year but they don’t include a trip to Orlando. Although it seems as if Prince Charming has lost my phone number and forgotten my name [sigh], I know things always workout somehow – and I’m not ruling out my happily ever after just yet [wink].
image links to the place I have not (yet) been